Happy Mother's Day, Mom.

Happy Mothers Day, Mom.

Today is Mother’s Day and I would like to dedicate this blog post to my Mother.

For all of the times she has stopped what she was doing to get me from work, an event, etc. Thank you.

For all of the times she has spent her hard earned money on my Dunkin Donut’s Coffee addiction, thank you.

For all of the times you have cleared your schedule to take me to a Fearless Movement event, scrambled to get coverage at work to come to a pageant, put back your clothes to purchase something for me (secretly because I would never have let her if she did in front of me), thank you.

Most importantly, All of the times you put our families needs above your own, THANK YOU.

I am in tears as I write this because I realize I couldn’t live this life of mine without you, either by my side or supporting me from afar. This journey through my diagnosis of Epilepsy, battling depression, overcoming my fears, creating Fearless Movement and accomplishing my dreams of winning a Miss America Local title (the 19^th time is the charm), has only created a stronger friendship/bond between us.

Mom, if it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t be the person I am today.

I say that with seriousness. Many know my mom instilled a faith in God and His will for our lives in our home. Well, I forgot about that when I fell into a deep depression my junior year of high school.

The side effects to the medication I was on caused a severe depression. My depression dug me into a deep hole I could not dig myself out of. I didn’t feel good enough. I didn’t feel “normal” and I most certainly did not feel like I deserved to live. Epilepsy not only took a toll on my life but my parents as well. They lived in constant fear that I would have one at any point in time and that it could take my life. My parents, especially my mom had to take me everywhere because I cannot drive due to my Epilepsy. I felt that MY illness held them back from opportunities for themselves.

BECAUSE OF MY MOM, I decided to FIGHT BACK. She shared with me the verse that helped me overcome my depression, fears, to trust God again and then motivated me to create Fearless Movement.

2 Timothy 1:7 “For God did not give me a spirit of Fear, but of Love, Power, and a Sound Mind.”

Because of HER many lives have been touched through Fearless Movement.

Mom, as I reflect over the past 8 years, of course we have hit rough patches. But those rough patches made our relationship into what it is today. I love you does not describe how much I care for you…not even close. I wouldn’t be stress free on the #RoadToMissNJ right now without you. I’d actually be a mess, LOL. With your guidance, love and support, I am who I am today and I couldn’t be more proud of who I have become because of YOU.

So once again, thank you for turning my life around. Thank you for instilling the morals and ethics in me I have today. Thank you for always being the string to tie our family back together after silly or not so silly arguments. Thank you for always cleaning my room and not taking my money that I say I’m going to pay you if you do clean it, LOL. Thank you for binge watching Gilmore Girls with me, dressing silly for halloween with me, and talking about all things such as relationships, coffee, Miss America, Fearless Movement, future plans, etc. I really have no other words to say to you, but thank you. You deserve the best Mother’s Day a mom could have. I really hope I can give that to you.

For those who have moms this Mother’s Day, reach out to them and say “Thank you.” They do a lot more than we give our mom’s credit for and they deserve more than a “Thank you.”

For those who don’t have a great relationship with your mom or have lost your mom, I sympathize for you and only pray my hardest for you during this time. Trust that God has a plan and reach out to a Mother figure in your life. Many in this world care for you. Always believe that and be the Mom to others, you wish you had.

As you see through my relationship with my mom, she has taught me to be fearless in all that I do. She has taught me to 1. Acknowledge my fears, 2. Confide in a friend for accountability, and 3. To finally overcome. I hope to be the person she is today to others – I encourage you to take that step and first, learn to be fearless by practicing those steps as well. #LeadByExample – I am grateful that my example, was my mommy.

Xoxo,

Ashley Kulikowski

Founder of Fearless Movement